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#16377
Hi everyone, I'm really looking for some useful ways on how to deal with my ex husbands fiancé. I separated from my ex in Feb 2015. We lived together for 18 months 'separated under one roof' as recognised by Centrelink. He started a second relationship with the neighbour, an older women, divorced for about five years I think with two grown kids, 15 and 19. I was very supportive of their relationship because she is a primary school teacher and often bought preloved toys over for my little boy who was about 4.5 years old. The day my son and I moved into our own place, she started controlling my ex and they turned on me so aggressively. My ex is a very weak man and a people-pleaser, he has no spine which is one of the reasons I fell out of love with him, because I lost respect for him. This woman has tried to get my ex to move my son from the school he has been in since kinder, they have told me to stop co-sleeping, they have accused me of more things then I even care to mention and they have treated me so badly, it caused me such anxiety and stress that I couldn't take in any more work at that time. I am also a Christian so I've really relied on God during this time and He has absolutely given me the strength to go on but this woman, now a fiancé to me ex has just inserted herself into my sons school life, leaving comments in the sight words book for prep, making notes in his readers book. She has told my son, now 5.5 that he is not allowed to wee in the shower and he is not allowed to do-sleep with his dad at her house, where my ex is now living. I just wondered how other single moms have dealt with new partners of the exes because I feel like this woman is doing all this on purpose. My ex hates my guts now and he took me to court which was only 5 weeks back but he did not get the orders he wanted, which was one week on, one week off. I got the orders I wanted howecer, I still feel so insecure about sharing my one and only child with this other woman whom my ex has put on a pedestal because she is a primary school teacher. My ex has refused to pay any school fees so I have taken that on by myself as well. I just feel so insecure at the moment, that my son will love this woman more than me and start seeing her as his mom although he keeps telling me when we talk about her becoming his step-mom, he always says 'I only want you as my mommy'.. and he told me that he told her that aswell when she tried to tell him she will be his step-mom. My boy and I are so close, everyone can see it but I'm really struggling with these feelings of anxiety and jealousy over having to share him with this other woman. I also had aggressive breast cancer when I was 28 and they said I would never fall pregnant to he is my miracle boy. I just want to know I'm not the only mom going through this rolloercoaster and unfamiliar territory. So sorry for long post.
#16392
I am sorry that I don't have enough time right now to say all that I want to BUT I can guarantee you that your son will love no-one as much as he loves you. IF she sticks around, he will see through her in time. Just love your son & do what you can each day for him and you'll get by just fine.
#16397
Their house their rules, your house your rules, no way tochange that sorry, if it is not in your orders you need to put in that no party or third party can speak I'll of threaten etc the other parent , to the other parent, to the child or in front of the child, keep a record of everything writen, have whitness on hand or press record if it Is in persom so Irish not he said she said