Feeling depressed & need another mums shoulder to cry on? Maybe you're feeling depressed about something (or everything!). Lighten your emotional load in here!
Forum rules: Please do not post any real names or identifying details in the forums (This is to comply with Section 121 of the Family Law Act, 1975, and also for privacy issues). This site does not contain legal advice. Where personal legal advice is required, please seek the assistance of a competent legal practitioner. Please read the complete forum rules, terms and conditions here: viewtopic.php?f=16&t=15&start=0
For any concerns regarding this forum, please contact us here: http://www.singlemum.com.au/contact/
By lovethyself
#10824
another saturday night and im home with the kids as usual in my jim jams doing nothing. the kids are in bed asleep, the cat is munching on something she shouldnt be, the telie is of, and all i can hear is the central heating cutting in and out and the traffic that passes by...
i love the quiet, the house is to full on during the day, but when the house is like this my mind starts to wonder...
no one here to talk to,
no adult stimulation,
just me and the cat and the kids.
is this what life has come to? me and the kids, the kids and me?
when did i turn that corner that said " once your around the bend its hard to find your way back"?

i love my kids, and i love being a single mum, i am in control,well most of the time... my son was diagnosed adhd the other week which was a great relief as i knew he had some sort of condition, but then i find im starting to get the "medication verses diet/exercise/fish oils" . it gets me down when the people around me i feel should support my decission start to question my decission.. i cant believe i have survived nearly 7yrs of hyponess..

i used to tell my family and friends everything that was happening around me and in my life then i started to close up a few years ago and now im starting to open up im finding im being critasized and judged. well i feel like i am, then i wonder should i just keep it to myself again..
i want to involve my family in my issues, iwant their support and points of views without making me feel im making the wrong decisions. i left my friend interstate when i relocated just over a year ago and of course those friendships have dwindled off, they arent what they used to be, i have only made a few friends here, but i dont want to burden them with my issues. they will run a mile..

how do we stop feeling like we are judged.
how do we stop feeling like we are to blame or we are the ones that put ourselves in this situation..
i am normally a strong, confident woman, but its at times like this im not..
By Angels3
#10829
Hi lovethyself I hear you loud and clear. I have exactly the same feelings. Boy oh boy it's a hard road. I don't feel it's depression but for two years I struggle on with the same thoughts. I am tired, alone and so damn had enough of trying to justify that I am a worthy mother. I don't have friends or family around just my 3 kids 24/7 and the dog I wonder when life will move on. What friends I had moved on as everyone gets tired of the same dull struggling story. My life is drug and alcohol tests, parenting courses and court and trying to hold it together.I desperately want it to finish so I can move house and move on but it seems as though it's taking forever. I am going to start property settlement so I can at least relocate though that is a big task. I just keep telling myself that it will change and to keep on surviving. I would love to meet some single Mums but don't know where to start. Big hugs to you.
By Boudicca
#10848
Hi,

Great post. I can totally relate to it. Most of my evenings are spent at home with my daughter. I'm in my PJ's by 7pm but I relish the time after she falls asleep around 7:30pm and I can clock off from my 12 hour mothering shift.

I made the effort last Saturday night to go out with friends and get out of the house. I was exhausted by 11:30pm and left much earlier than my friends. I felt guilty but I had been awake since the crack of dawn. I think I may have to give the pub scene a miss from now on, do not really enjoy it anymore.

It's been 3 years since my ex-husband and I split. I look back and have seen some drastic improvements in my life since then. e.g. insomnia and anxiety have eased, dealings with my ex have all but disappeared and I have no impending court cases.

However as a single mother I feel like I am constantly treading water, to stay afloat financially, emotionally and physically.

If live in the outer eastern suburbs of Melbourne if you ever want to catch up for a cuppa.
By lovethyself
#10850
thanks ladies, its makes me feel better knowing im not alone. i know the roller coaster has his highs and lows but when we are on our own its hard to keep focused.. ive been out of the marriage for 5yrs and whilst every day i remind myself "this time next year it will be totally different and much better/easier" it is right, this year is easier than last and last year easier than the year before, but now i am faced with a totally different situation, i have grown and changed, my emotions are all over the place, i feel and see critisism everyday, maybe its my mindset, maybe i am a tad insecure, lacking a bit of confidence, im not really sure.... but i know that everyday i look around my house and sigh...
i would love to meet up for coffee sometime, but im on the peninsular, maybe we can made a day of it.. kids, park, lunch.. :)
By Angels3
#10853
I would totally love to catch up but I'm in Queensland. Sorry. All that we can do is ride the roller coaster and do whatever we can do to rebuild our beautiful selves. That means taking time out of Motherhood to rediscover ourselves and work on our self development to undo the damage that has been done. Reading positive books, exercising and nourishing and treating ourselves. We all will get there but it will be a bumpy road. Good luck to all us girls we are the strength and love that our children so need. :D