Pregnant and on your own? We'd love to hear about it, and when you're due!
You can post in here to find other single and pregnant mums to share your journey with too! Or maybe even get some advice from those of us that have been-there, done-that!
By Lanstar87
#7585
Hey Dannielle,

I'll have to add you on Facebook, I feel like we are in the exact same situation, Im now 7 months pregnant Due April 5 found out I'm having a lil girl and my ex is denying she is his, he is saying he doesn't have the capacity to be her father and that he couldn't be bothered being her life at all. He demands a dna test when she is born and basically has done nothing but abuse me this whole time. We were together 6 years but now he acts like we are strangers and never met, he has basically cut all contact with me and is seeing the same chick he cheated on me with :(. Life is really hard and I am finding everyday a deep struggle i don't have many friends because i had to move from his abuse as well. Its nice to know at least I'm not alone and to have other people to talk to and sympathise with. I hope things can only get better, all we can do is be strong for our children as they need us and I'm sure they will be much better off not having these scumbag men in their lives. It hurts so much but we just have to keep remembering they are better off.
By Dannielle
#7611
It's funny how these guys operate and that any other woman would want them..but you do attract what you are, so maybe their as bad as each other. We are better off without these guys and need to laugh at how they are only making things worse cause one day they will turn around and want something to do with their child and the child will be old enough to tell them where to go or us mother's will be strong and tell them ourselves.

I just laugh at the texts because once these beautiful little angels are in our arms and they have their dna proof, their really running out of things to deny. Part of me hopes once she is born he might leave us alone also.

It would be hard living where you don't really know anyone..does the hospital have any groups you could go to and meet other mum's etc just to take your mind a little off of it? Try and get out and about and do things that make you feel better about it all. My friends have tried telling me to think of it like he isn't the father etc...but yeah that doesn't work much. It is a daily struggle but you gotta think about you and your precious little girl growing inside of you.
By User123
#7622
I read quite a few of the posts on here and I can't believe how some of these fathers are behaving. It seems to be a common thing for men to deny their own children! My ex, the father of my 5 year old, had a baby with one of the many gfs he's had since we broke up. When she was pregnant, he moved 3 hours away from us to live with her parents and called me to tell me he no longer wanted to see our son. Their relationship fell apart very quickly, he was kicked out after assaulting his gf and she placed an AVO on him before the child was even born. Then he came crawling back wanting to see our son again after ignoring him for 9 months. He only met the new baby a few times and now has nothing to do with him and he says as far as he's concerned he only has one son (my son) and his other son "doesn't exist".

Anyways, I'm 11 weeks pregnant with my second child (different father to my son) and I was never in a relationship with the father. The father doesn't know and I'm still contemplating whether to tell him or not. The pregnancy was definitely not planned but I am happy nonetheless. I have been receiving a lot of judgment though from family members. It's funny how people are treating me completely different as opposed to when I was pregnant with my first. My first pregnancy wasn't planned either but i was in a relationship with the father and after we found out, we got engaged. This time around, simply because there's no man in the picture some people are looking down on me. When I told my grandmother the news, she just stared at me like I just told her I had cancer and then changed the subject! Ive also had my cousin's husband (whom I've only met twice and barely ever had a conversation with) ridiculed me on fb for becoming a single mother again, asking me who the father is etc! It was unbelievably rude and judgmental. Other people have not said anything but have completely ignored my baby news.

I have had a baby with the father in the picture and he was not supportive, treated me badly and gave up on our family when my son was 1 so he could start dating a 16 year old. Looking back, I wish I had cut him out of the picture when i was pregnant, it would have saved a lot of heartache for me and my son. Having the father in the picture is not always what's best.
By LostButHappy
#7962
Hi, a mother of 2 soon to be 3 and im 24 yrs of age im only a couple of weeks pregnant and know when in a 4 day period the child was concieved I also have two boys, one who is 4 and just started prep this year(his father committed suicide in June last year - this made me very angry that he couldnt live for his son and that due to his relationship breakdown who he was with at the time he decided to do that, he was very emotionally and phisically damaging through pregnancy and after we split when my son was only 2) My newest addition is only 17mths was with his father for 3 years on an off was engaged twice, but has had devistating effects of my emotionionally and phisically, he was there to help raise my first child who calls him dad his all he has ever really known. I have a dvo currently protecting myself and the children from him, although we have breached this dvo sereral times as we tried to sort things out but it always seems to end the same :( and on the last attempt of this my 3rd child was concieved.

He is 30 and older then I am since then it has been war for me, with being told the baby wasnt his and i was a cheater and all the rest of it to him spying on me with phone software to hacking my fb and humiliating me posting nasty and volgar comments allover his wall and by far the icing on the cake he posted nude photos of me on my own fb page!!! I love him a lot and through the years i have forgiven him for some horenduss otrocities, this morning he told me that its ended and yeah he wants this and that, i live with my mum and have since the dvo was put in place over a year ago, I am at a loss i have so much on my mind at the moment, with trying to raise the kids then booking a doctors appointment to confirm my pregnancy and then everything that comes after that i am in a small town and my mum has told me im on my own i went back to him so i have to "deal" with it. Its hard and hurtful, with no support and bills and yeah im buckeling, I have no friends at all in this town whats so ever, im so lonely and miss conversation :(

Im left, trying to manage all this by myself, i have been finding trying to raise the boys at times difficult, i suppose every parent has these moments, but i am extremely petrofide of doing this myself, im so worried about how i am going to go, i feel very sad and so far not managing well, life seems so stressful, everything i suppose is within walking distance in a matter of speaking, but being in a small area. I often think what people would say and the looks, as everyone knows everyone even getting the pregnancy test from the iga then look on the person serving me... :cry: as my pregnancy progresses it will be harder to hide and harder to deal with i remember how i was with my other two children, it worries me a lot. How am i going to cope? i find myself asking, if i ponder on this to much it breaks my heart and i feel angry for being in this situation, I dont want to develope post natal depression... I have suffered from depression when i was only 17 I know that it is possible to get through this and that I can, I just feel so heart broken, confused and sad. I have my two boys they are well looked after by me i love my children, if i cant look after myself and let myself crumble then they will suffer, sometimes its hard to stay strong and feel happy and pull yourself through. I am learning this hard lesson everyday... I have never had to do a pregnancy by myself, but i have no one holding my hand now, and im finding that really hard... I say to myself that i will love this child even if their father doesnt not, they only have me. I just feel so lost and helpless, like a fish out of water....

There are just so many mean people in the world and its like there all around me... I need someone to talk to something anything as the weeks progress i feel like im just gonna drown.. Im so scared, if anyone lives near the caboolture area let me know its the closest i can travel... but im shattered... thanks anyways
By golfmick
#8104
I am a nearly 52 year old guy who is very keen to again have a family.

For years I thought I did, bringing up 6yo girl for 12 years as a surrogate father, before discovering the mother was having a clandestine sexual relationship for the final 6 years, and demanding the girl keep it quiet.

So it is sometimes the guy trying to do the right thing that gets shafted...I hope everyone can find a genuine partner who wants to share life, develop a family and grow older with love and honest commitment to each other and shared pride in the achievements of any junior versions that arrive!
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