In fact, I'd say it your 'reasonableness' that is causing you to feel this way. You WANT to help, you WANT to make nice, but all the time he exploits your good nature and YOU end up feeling like YOU may have done something 'wrong' to cause all this. Let me tell you what you already know - THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT..
He is an emotional cripple who leans on you and demands that you 'fix' his problem. You already know what would happen IF you took him back, and you also know that that is NEVER going to happen, and would never be a good thing - not for anyone involved.
What you need, and want, is a way to make the pain of it diminish.
Puchilin, believe in yourself, do not give up on yourself, you know in your heart what you must do, so persevere.
Things will get better, but it takes time.
Allow yourself time to grieve, again, the loss of should have and could have been, but is not. Always, and I mean always, question yourself and your motives, make sure you do what you do because you know and believe it is the right thing to do, and then do it. do it anyway. believe and act according to your knowledge and belief that you know what is right and therefore good and proper.
Things are going to get better, and you are going to be ok. all of you.
It's true when they say a lepard does not ever change his spots and my ex has done an excellent job in proving to me over and over again that he has not changed that he always will the victim and yes instead of doing the work himself he wants Me to fix his life for him.
He just repulses me the way he cries shamelessly infront of his kids because they do not want to go with him trying to make them feel guilty it is sickening and gutless. Everyone is at fault but poor him he is and always will be and wants to be the victim even infront of his kids sadly enough.